Sunday, June 14, 2009

Antifeminist Jokes


Each of the following are selections from The Politically Incorrect Joke Book.

Q: How many feminist presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?
A: It's going to be dark for the next four years, isn't it?

Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be open when she brings it to you.

Q: How many men does it take to fix a woman's watch?
A: Why does she need a watch? There's a clock on the oven!

Q: How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just one. She holds it still and waits for the world to revolve around her.

18 comments:

  1. So a man is driving his car when he runs over his wife, whos fault is it?

    A. its the women's fault cause she left the kitchen

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hate to say it, but these scarcely live up to your motto. They more like validate feminism than reveal it. These tired old retreads are as dusty as a pack of feminist slogans. Here's something a bit more like:

    Why Do Men Die First? This is a question that has gone unanswered for centuries... but, now we know.

    * If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race... you're a male chauvinist.
    * If you stay home and do the housework... you're a pansy.

    * If you work too hard... there's never any time for her.
    * If you don't work enough... you're a good-for-nothing lazy prick.

    * If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay... this is exploitation.
    * If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay... you should get off your lazy ass and find something better.

    * If you get a promotion ahead of her... that is favoritism.
    * If she gets a job ahead of you... it's equal opportunity.

    * If you mention how nice she looks.... its sexual harassment.
    * If you keep quiet... it's male indifference.

    * If you cry... you're a wimp.
    * If you don't... you're an insensitive bastard.

    * If you make a decision without consulting her... you're a chauvinist.
    * If she makes a decision without consulting you... she's a liberated woman.

    * If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy... that's domination.
    * If SHE asks you... it's a favor.

    * If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear... you're a pervert.
    * If you don't... you're gay.

    * If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape... you're sexist.
    * If you don't... you're unromantic.

    * If you're proud of your achievements... you're full of yourself.
    * If you're not... you're not ambitious.

    * If you try to keep yourself in shape... you're vain.
    * If you don't... you're a slob.

    * If you buy her flowers... you're after something.
    * If you don't... you're not thoughtful.

    * If she has a headache... she's tired.
    * If you have a headache... you don't love her anymore.

    * If you want it too often... you're oversexed.
    * If you don't... there must be someone else.

    Men Die First Because They Want To!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Damn feminist bitches need to shut the fuck the fuck up.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Go shoot yourself, Worthless Sack of Shit. I'm sick of people like you who make fun of feminists and spread stereotypes about them. You're just pretending to be an anti feminist, so you can fit in and find a husband. Admit it.
    And if you're actually a guy, then you're not a an antifeminist. You're just a sexist who believes people should follow gender roles and not have a choice.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Dear Anonymous of "Go shoot yourself" fame....

    That is an interesting paragraph you wrote, full of femtard sloganeering and ad hominem attacks! Very nice! I take it that is a paper you are preparing for a graduate class in "Women's Studies"?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Q. Why did men invent shopping trolley's?
    A. To teach woman to walk on their back paws.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am a woman and I can vote, I am in college, and I plan on having a career. Feminism is a waste of energy. We are equal now so deal with it go get a sense of humor and just shut the hell up. On that note here is a joke

    If a tree falls on a a woman in a forest does she make a sound?

    Better question is why is the kitchen in a forest?

    ReplyDelete
  8. What means,when women walk into a living room from kitchen?
    -That her chain is too long.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Feminism in itself is a form of sexism, I myself am a sixteen year old girl, and proud to be. But I don't want to be better than men, I want to be equal. I want to have a say, not control.

    ReplyDelete
  10. You're fucking equal. We let you have jobs now, I mean it was bad enough when you wanted to leave the kitchen now you all think you're so high and mighty.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Dear Anonymous of "Go shoot yourself" fame....

    If you object to people poking fun out of feminism, why the hell are you reading this page in the first place??

    ReplyDelete
  12. Femtards are so accustomed to receiving nothing but constant validation for their intellectually incomprehensible positions that the merest probing, ribbing, or questioning produces a violent reaction, like "Go shoot yourself!"

    People who are right don't respond like that....

    ReplyDelete
  13. Q:Why did the feminist cross the road?
    A:To suck my dick

    ReplyDelete
  14. I'm a woman, and I find this to be insanely hilarious. On that note...
    A young man on the eve of his wedding goes to his father and asks, "Father, why are wedding dresses white?"
    To this he replied, "Well, didn't you know that all household appliances come in white?"

    ReplyDelete
  15. I'm a woman and I agree with everyone's funny crap, even the female who should take some midol, change her tampon and get over herself. No Jokes here. Just enjoying the "anti feminist jokes".

    ReplyDelete
  16. i like to please women but it became too much issue and now they are demanding it..
    uhmm jokes,,,

    Why i have to pay for filling the hole?
    why the fuck i have to foreplay even it didnt give me any pleasure out of it?
    why she cant be satified while i can in 5 min?
    A: she is designed that way

    God why she is annoying all the time, why she wants my attention all the time, why she hates my friends, why cant she watch games with me, why she is self center, why she talks like a radio, why she dont talk with sense, why she dont have ability to hear what i am saying in the argument, why she is not cool after marriage, why why why lot of why

    biggest why is... why she is not romantic and why she is not naughty and open minded like me.....

    Feminist bitches scares me.. men mind is designed like,, during stressful conditions "fight or fly away"... and women mind goes crazy, nuts, hatret etc...

    why she is making my life complicated?

    ReplyDelete